For the past 3 years, I believe God has been teaching me on the principles of Godly marriage. One of the topics that I was struggling to understand is wife's submission to her husband, so whenever I could read Ephesians 5:22 " Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands" In my head I am like yah yah I get it, but deep down I knew I didn't . Until recently when God opened my eyes to this gem.
Before jumping into this important topic, I want to say that, everyday we take time to prepare, either for work, exams, moving houses, weddings, food etc all these are important but there are temporal too but we forget to prepare for something that affects us in this life on earth and life to come in heaven, a matter of life or death, thats MARRIAGE. We can get busy on how many guests we would want to invite, the color code, the cake, the venue and so on but we forget to take time to learn what are the responsibilities within the married couples, How to please your spouse, How to take care of the children given to us by God etc. Thats why there are so many divorces in the world and in the church. I would advice those who are single, engaged or even the married couple to take time to know Marriage God's way and what it takes to make marriage successful.All these don't come naturally, they need to be implanted into our minds. Books that I recommend, The Bible, The Adventist Home, Letters to young lover, Christian Temperance and Bible hygiene. If we pray God will teach us through the Holy Spirit all things that we need to know. He has been teaching me and I will share just a glimpse of what He has taught me so far.
What is Submission??? What does it mean to submit?? Before we start concluding into our heads what it means, First and foremost we are Christians and we claim to be Christ's follower. Lets look how our Master, our Lord Jesus Christ, how He submitted to God the father. Its beautiful picture of submission. In Joh 5:19 Then answered Jesus and said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise.
Joh 12:49 For I have not spoken of myself; but the Father which sent me, he gave me a commandment, what I should say, and what I should speak.
Joh 12:50 And I know that his commandment is life everlasting: whatsoever I speak therefore, even as the Father said unto me, so I speak.
All these are just examples of Christ submitting to God the Father, the oneness between the two. Although Jesus is God, but He chose to submit to God, to His's Father's will, even to submit to the point of dying on the cross to save us, Its amazing. In the garden of gethsemane, He prayed Luk 22:42 "Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done"
Now lets answer the question what submission is?! Submission means choosing to yield to another's will, As we have seen Christ chose to yield to His father's will. Submission makes us die to self, deny self, choosing to trust someone's else decision to be the best decision for the particular situation.
Submission doesn't mean to be controlled or say nothing, do everything you are told to do, No! No! Its quite the opposite, its a CHOICE. God gives us free will, to choose what we think its best for us.
Submission doesn't start in marriage life,but rather its starts with our Christian walk even while we are single. When we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and savior. We choose to be led by Him every day, every moment, by allowing Him to take control of our lives because we love him, trust him and believe on Him that He knows whats best for us.
Thats why in His word, He said, we need;
- To submit to God ; Jas 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
- To submit to those ruling us ; 1Pe 2:13 Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme;
- To submit to one another; Eph 5:21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
- Wives submit to your husband: Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Col 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Submission starts with God first and obeying His word. We can't submit to God without knowing what to submit to, If we don't take time to read His word, then we wont know how to obey Him.
God is God of order. This is how He designed a family
1Co 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Head of children- Father&Mother&Christ
Head of Woman- Man
Head of Man- Christ
Head of Church- Christ
Head of Christ- God
Sounds simple right??!! But why thats not the reality???
We live in a day and age where everyone wants their rights, children rights, women rights, homosexual rights etc, but is it really how God wants it to be that way? That's something to ponder about. Thats why when women read Eph 5:22 about submitting to their husbands, they may say, " dont tell me what to do, I know what i am doing " or they could agree in their husband's presence and do something different when their husbands are not there and they may rebel and cause many conflicts and arguments in the family. A good example is Eve in the garden of Eden, God told Adam and His wife not to eat from the forbidden tree and Adam was in charge, what if Eve could submit to God and to her husband, She could not have eaten of the forbidden tree and cause Adam to sin and we became sinful by nature but what did she do, She had self confidence and gave a way to be tempted by satan, she left her husband side.
Let me share a story of what happened yesterday, my mum applied for a visa for country A but also she planned to go to country B first then to Country A. As time was ticking, two days before the travel, we became worried that the passport wouldn't come on time. My dad told my mom to go and check if the passport has been returned at the visa application centre. In my head I am thinking, thats not possible, we can't go there and be successful because they haven't sent a notification email to say we should go and collect the passport. My mom was on my side for a moment then she changed her mind and obeyed and I went with her to the visa application centre, although the passport wasn't there but one lady kindly said," if it comes, I will ring you immediately and you will come and collect it" and the same day in the evening, she was called and went to collect it. What if mum could have not listened to my dad and waited for the notification email, and with only one day left , she could have been more stressed and who knows what could have happened.
Submission doesn't mean you have no opinion on the issue but rather you can bring up the ideas and ways to tackle the issue but let the Husband do the final decision because He is the leader/ head of the family and the house. Let the men do the big decisions and us ladies do our responsibilities of taking care of the family, house, children and sorts. Without Christ we cannot do it. We need Him to help us and He is willing to do so as He has promised in his word. Claim the promise! Pray! Claim the promise!
Amen
I hope and pray that we have learned together a thing or two on submission.
God bless you
